Life Algebra

I wasn’t going to post this, so I sent it to Malcom, but after re-reading it, I think it’s fairly funny, if you can follow it…

*Some explicit details have been removed from following email:

Malcom —

I was going to put this on my blog, but it sounded a little more like something that would be most enjoyed by you and would make everyone else think I was smoking crack going off the deep end.  That, and I can’t remember what 8 to the 4th power equals and I can’t find the power button on my calculator.  That’s right baby…I may be smart about some things, but numbers ain’t one of them…thankfully I’m good at ****** other things…otherwise you might not be able to tolerate me.  😛

Enjoy the following “life algebra”…hopefully you can make sense of it:

If quitting smoking = “a” and losing weight = “b,” and a rating scale of 1-10 is used, with 1 = easy and 10 being torture, we can assign the following values:

a = 6; b = 10…and make the following calculations:

Assuming that (a+b)/2 = average difficulty of completing a and b simultaneously, we come up with (6 + 10)/2 = 8, making the results of the calculation somewhere around “very difficult.” 

However, this equation is flawed, as it does not take into account “c,” which we will term “baseline irritability rating”.  In our equation, let’s say that c = 4. 

We would therefore use the equation {(a+b)/2)} ^ c, OR

{(6 + 10)/2} ^4 ….

making the average difficulty of doing both at once…well you get the idea (I never was much good at math). 



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