The Skinny on Curly Fat

Today, I will strive to be productive, as I was a lazy-ass yesterday.  I worked about a half day and then came home and slept because I only had about four hours of sleep the night before.  Of course, this caused me to get up this morning at 3:30, so I will need to not take a nap today and stay up until at least 9:00 to get back on schedule.

I knew that the bball trip would mess up my sleep schedule, and that it would be compounded by the fact that the time changed over the weekend.  At least I’m an expert on sleep and I know how to get myself back on track.

I see Goddess of Mindfulness this weekend and I’m looking forward to it, as I have some important issues to talk about.  Also, just going always makes me feel more in control and like I am actually doing something about the small problems that life brings. 

It seems that I have finally pulled out of my funk (fingers crossed).  I’m pretty sure it has everything to do with a) four days off from work and b) sunshine and warm weather.  I always go through a rough time from about mid-January to early March and then usually snap out of it. 

I know I’m relieved to be feeling better, and I’m sure that Malcom and my family are relieved as well.  I’ve made it through another winter.  YAY!

I was so pissed yesterday, I thought about writing a blog called “Curly Fat Must Die.”  This woman is driving me crazy.  She’s a know-it-all and gives unsolicited advice about things that she shouldn’t even go there with, considering that she barely knows me.  That and she’s a hypocrite. 

She has subtly criticized my weight and smoking habits several times and it came about yesterday that she really went there, which makes no sense considering she probably weighs more than I do and is about a foot shorter and she smokes. 

I briefly said something about quitting smoking, to which she said something about how I always talk about quitting smoking and losing weight but I don’t do anything about it.  I almost slammed her fat ass to the ground lost it, but I collected myself and we had the following short conversation:

Me:  I don’t even know why I talk to you.

CF:  Because I’m the only other person in this office.

I vow to be cordial but never again make conversation or make any reference to anything about my personal life, or ask her anything about her personal life for that matter.  There will be no more, “Hi, how’s it going?” or “Man, I slept like crap last night.”

I will answer any question she has that is work-related in as perfunctory a manner as I can and other than that I will ignore her.  I plan on using the phrase, “That is none of your business” as often as possible. 

Basically, CF is going to receive the silent treatment, because otherwise I might go off my healthy eating plan and eat a bag of Skittles to keep myself from punching her in the face I may just let her know exactly how I feel, and then I might get fired. 

And I don’t want to do that.  Because as I’ve mentioned before, I don’t want to live under the bridge and feed my dog horse meat.


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