Working At Getting in a Rut

A sound night’s sleep has eluded me for the past week.  I’m not quite sure what to chalk it up to, but I think maybe I have been using my sun lamp too much.  That, and I’ve started eating again, which is definitely making me feel different.  Nauseous and disgusting, truth be told.  I suppose that’s what happens when all you eat is ramen noodles and mac and cheese for two months and then start eating protein and vegetables again.  Bleh. 

My head is really filled with fuzz this morning, namely due to a lack of sleep.  I had to close last night, so didn’t get home until 10:45 p.m. and then didn’t fall asleep until 12:30 a.m.  I was up at 4:00 a.m., totally unable to sleep anymore, to even lie still anymore.  Just restless.  And now foggy.  Should make for a great day at work, although I’m trying to stay positive.  I have to be really careful with sleep loss, because sleep disturbance can send me off the deep end.  I have an appointment with my psychiatrist next Monday.  If things haven’t resolved by then, I may ask for some 25 mg of Seroquel until I can get back on track. 

Matt and I have been making plans for him to move in.  There is a great deal of work for me to do, namely clearing out a bunch of stuff and junk so that there is room for his stuff.  We’re trying to decide what furniture to put where, how to make more room in my tiny kitchen, and what to do with what will end up being four beds (a queen, a full, and two twins).  I live in a two-bedroom house full of furniture and he lives in a two-bedroom apartment full of furniture.  Creates a bit of a dilemma, especially since all of the furniture is refurbished antique for the most part.  Not exactly stuff you put out at the side of the road or get rid of at all, for that matter. 

I realize this post seems kind of flat, but, like I said, I’m in a fog.  I’m basically forcing myself to blog so that I can get back into a routine for the winter, which is usually a hard time for me.  But it doesn’t have to be.  I’m just safe-guarding my mental health, doing what I know works.  In DBT, that’s called effectiveness.  In my world, it’s the necessary repetition of a routine. 

I think a little Bob is just what the doctor ordered for the day.  You don’t have to listen, QoB.  🙂

Bob Dylan, Shelter From the Storm

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