I experienced intense and overwhelming feelings of joy, satisfaction, and gratitude today. While in the past this may have given me pause, caused me to examine whether or not I was having mood swings, today I did not have to. Because I’m happier than a pig in shit, for lack of a better phrase, and that’s just how it is.
l know that I have bitched about my job at the home improvement store to no end, and a few posts later said how much I enjoy it. I’ve come to realize that I love that job for what it can give me in the moment. I love that job for being easy, for that instant gratification when I help someone in a concrete way, for all of the opportunities to talk talk talk my head off. Today I fully appreciated that job and what it has done for me. My bills are partially paid, I can interact with other people better than I have ever been able to, and it’s a genuinely fun, totally stress-free eight hours.
Having said that, I can’t stay there forever. And have never had any intentions on doing so. I’ve been applying and interviewing recently. I have a few promising things on the horizon. More shall be said when I know more. No jinxing myself. Not that I believe in that kind of thing (as I cross my fingers behind my back).
I have the next two days off and will spend tomorrow cooking with QoB and the next eating with QoB, DHut and other family and friends. I’m really looking forward to it. Really, for me, you could almost get rid of Thanksgiving and just give me the day before with my madre, cooking and dancing in the kitchen. That’s what Thanksgiving is all about, for me.
I came home from work last night and two sinks worth of dishes were done. Either Matt is reading the blog, or my new philosophy of making small suggestions and then saying, “You should do whatever you want,” is working. Because really, I don’t mind doing 90% of it. I just want a little help with a few things. And a foot rub.
I think the key thing I am really loving about life right now is that things in general are starting to make sense. All of these little lightbulbs keep popping off in my head and I can see what QoB was talking about, or what Pasha described in his comments, or that little lecture about motor oil, life, and work from DHut. When my life is clearer and more stress-free, my mind is clearer and I can really think about things, instead of ruminating on the past or the future. Once again, it all goes back to being mindful and living in the moment.
I’ve sat at this computer for a good ten minutes now, getting up once to check my corn dogs and fries (hallelujah for normal eating), because I can’t really figure out how to end this post. I want to say thank you and I want to say great things about these great people that helped me change my life. I do think, however, that I would go on and on and would somehow forget someone.
So, in short, thank you.
Yes, I mean you.
Bon Jovi, Thank You for Loving Me (see comments for lyrics)