Pieces Fall Together

One of the worst things about being overweight and out-of-shape is that you’re not able to keep up with other people when you really want to.  My sister, brother-in-law, Dr. Love, and Mom were all here today working on the garage sale.  I was able to keep it up from about 10 – 4:30 but I have totally crapped out now.  I just had to say “I’m done!”  I am done mentally, emotionally, physically.  So much stuff!!

On a more positive note, the house is more cleaned out and the garage sale is getting organized.  I finally cleared out all of the decorations and bric-a-brac in the upstairs bathroom.  There were seashells everywhere, a big shelving unit that just wasn’t my style, and now it’s all gone.  I also cleaned out the linen closet and put all of my towels and what-not in there.  It’s like it’s actually my bathroom now.  Next step is to empty the linen closet at the old house and bring everything over.  Why is it that I collect half-full bottles of shampoo and body wash?  Going to be some stuff going in the trash, hopefully.

A couple of weeks ago I finally went to my first appointment with my new primary care physician.  I had rescheduled three times and not gone, so QoB went with me this time.  I was just afraid of getting bad news, afraid of what he would say.  About my weight, smoking, all the medication I take, so on and so forth.  Turns out I had nothing to worry about.  He didn’t seem fazed by the long list of psychotropics, didn’t mention smoking, and we talked about my digestive problems, which is something I have always thought was an issue of med toxicity.

My doctor suggested that I give up all dairy products for three weeks, that perhaps I am lactose intolerant.  He encouraged me to “eat like a cave man” and after rebelling for the first little while, I have completely cut all dairy out of my diet.  Becoming a real Paleon, with all of my lean meats, vegetables, berries, and nuts.  One of the good things about eating this way is that it really cuts out processed food, especially fast food.  Although I was skeptical at first, my body is really feeling a lot better without all that dairy I was eating.  I suspect I really am lactose-intolerant and plan to keep up with the Paleo-diet.  Thank you, Dr. Caveman.  My tummy appreciates it.

I was able to talk to Goddess of Mindfulness today about some things that have been really bothering me.  Mostly about work, some stuff about my interactions with other people, and how angry I have been feeling.  She made some really good suggestions.  Along with some things my mom said about my job and the plan I have set out for next week thanks to GoM, I think my mind is going to be able to rest for awhile about the job issue.  I really hope so, because the topic really consumes me and doesn’t let me enjoy my free time.

I went off my Cymbalta a few weeks ago.  My thinking at the time was that I wasn’t very good about taking it regularly and I didn’t feel very depressed so I didn’t need it.  Holy crap, how many times have I seen that behavior in my own clients and just shook my head?!  So I stopped taking it.  Cold turkey.  There is a part of me that wonders if that had something to do with how I have been feeling lately.  Not really depressed, more angry and irritable and hopeless.  Hmmm.  I am thinking about taking it again, but I haven’t decided for sure.  I guess I don’t really have anything to lose by taking it, but I want to actually take it as prescribed rather than now and then when I remember or am feeling bad.

I think I am going to come up with a couple more med-minders.  I have medicine I take at night, and if I take Cymbalta then I will be taking something in the morning.  It would also be nice to take my Zyrtec in the morning for full effectiveness.  QoB made the suggestion that I start taking the rest of my psych meds as prescribed, as well.  That would mean that I would take some in the morning, and in the evening.  Right now I just take everything at night because I am a stubborn, opinionated dumb-ass.  With Sundowner’s.

Yael Naim, Paris


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