Busy Week Leads to Minor Meltdown

I have had something going on every day this week, which is highly unusual.  Usually, I will have at least one day where there is nothing scheduled, but this week has been different.  And it’s not until you have a really busy week that you realize how much you need that one day.

My sister’s baby shower is this Saturday and I have been helping QoB amp up for it.  We’ve cleaned house and made party favors, wrapped gifts and listened to a lot of Paul Simon.  I have probably been less-than-stellar  help because I am having problems recently with focusing, but I’d like to think I’m helping in some way, just by following orders and not freaking out.

The freakout came today, starting around 1:00 and still hasn’t quite ended.  My problem is that, when my schedule starts getting busy, I stop doing the things that keep me sane.  Like cleaning my kitchen, keeping the laundry going, blogging, reading, spending time with DSB.  My kitchen being unclean probably drives me the most batty.  And I think that trait is inherited.

I feel like I haven’t been at home at all this week, and have also had a rather upsetting time with my pup developing a huge hot-spot on her  chest.  Then there was the giving her a bath at 11:00pm last night, getting last-minute vet appointment, and generally feeling a lot of guilt for not giving her more baths and not paying better attention.  I feel like crap about it.

And the last two nights I have barely slept.  It’s almost like I drank a pot of coffee before I slipped under the covers.  I’m not sure what the deal is, but all I can do is lay in bed and think of all the things I should and could be doing, or more specifically, the things I should have done during the day that I didn’t.  I am wondering if I’m not having some sort of cycling issue here as of late.  My sleep is messed up, my mood is up and down, I can’t focus, and my thoughts are racing.  About a week ago I was having a lot of problems with anger and irritability but thankfully that has passed.

I think the issue is that, while I have had structure, I also haven’t had much quiet time to regroup.  I’m also anxious about tomorrow’s baby shower, because I don’t see my sister much and I want it to go off well, and there will also be people there that I don’t care to see that I will have to deal with anyway.  Social situations are extremely difficult for me, but it’s not like I’m going to miss the shower because of it.  It is important to her and it is important to QoB, so I will be there and put my happy, polite face on.

I also set really high expectations of myself for NaBloPoMo, and don’t feel like I quite did it justice today, but at least I put something out there.  Better planning for tomorrow, for sure.  Today, I just needed to get this out there.

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14 thoughts on “Busy Week Leads to Minor Meltdown

  1. I had a similar week – a few things going on everyday that left me too tired to regroup and restructure. I had a meltdown on Thursday. Feel much better now though and back to normal!

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  2. Didn’t meet your goal? 🙂 You’re right on time– you wrote honestly, fluidly, and introduced us to a few of the things that make you tick. Chica, I think you aced it! 🙂 Sleep well tonight, try some tea, and have a blast at the shower! 😀

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  3. You, MsSmartiepants, are a hella lot further down the road of n.o.w. than you give yerself credit for. If there’s a glitch to the past week, QofD will certainly own it for being off her own game of life.

    Mija… one’s own life must be about oneself. Good for you, to take the time to own it… for you. Yer lofty goals of suiting others must exhaust ya. 😉

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  4. I have Bipolar disorder, too so I feel a sudden kinship with you after reading this post. I struggle with social situations myself. I hope all goes well and I look forward to reading more of your blog.

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  5. Minor meltdowns are totally my go to. 😉 I think that structure is good, but that you need to sometimes be insistent about scheduling in some margin, some space, some rest and some play. At least I do.

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    • You are so right storygirl! I put my foot down this afternoon and didn’t do a darned thing, including vetoing more socializing. Feeling much better now!

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  6. You did just fine with your post today!!! Coming over from the Poblano YeahWrite NaBloPoMo can I put anymore words in there links! I think you do what you can and some days the writing is going to be far more stellar than other days. And that is okay. Sounds like you have had quite a week —hope things settle down a bit and you get some quiet time that you need.

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  7. I like your post today. I have been where you are now, especially in the sleep category lately. My post today…well, I was so afraid to put it out there. I did it anyway. Hope you enjoyed the shower today! Hugs

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    • Well thanks, Kim! I am now intrigued about what your day’s post was, so I’ll be hustling over after I get today’s blog done. I feel like I do a lot of putting posts out that maybe aren’t the best, but I find that it helps me, and every once in awhile it helps someone else too, and I think that’s just friggin awesome!

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      • Thanks Rose…There are times I want my posts to be all about content, proper grammar etc., but if I’m going to be honest, and learn about myself, then sometimes it’s going to just be raw posting.

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