It’s Mother’s Day Eve and QoD had to have herself a fish-fry. I know, I know, I wasn’t going to go. I had 12 hours of sleep last night, and woke up feeling very groggy. I missed the breakfast I was supposed to have with Dad and his wife. I barely made it to work on time. But by 10:15, MAN, was I perky!
So I decided this morning that I was going to go to the fish fry. I just felt so GOOD and life is AMAZING and whomp-whomp-whomp. I can’t decide if I’m genuinely feeling just that good, or if this is still some hypomania trailing around. Probably a little of both. Twelve hours of sleep will do amazing things if you haven’t had much in the past month.
We had a little rain, so the cooking didn’t even start until around 7:30, which is way too late to start a fish fry, if you’ve ever been to one. We didn’t have any food until 8:30 and no fish until 9:00. That’s ok though because I had a great time chatting with everyone.
Everybody was there, Blue Cat and Rock and Tall Tale and QoB and the Big Dawg. Even Snickers, who used to work at the store until he had some medical problems that put him on disability, was there. I think a good time was had by all. The evening mostly consisted of re-telling funny shop stories and everyone giving each other shit.
Blue Cat gave me the most shit of all. He claims he’s going to “hook me up” with Snickers (who is also his best friend). I just don’t know about that. I’m definitely not wanting to be hooked up with anyone period, but Snickers is also a lot older than I am and has a lot of health problems. I hope Blue Cat is just pulling my chain, but he kept saying about it and swore he was being serious. I wouldn’t mind hanging out and having fun, but not on a relationship level, at all.
Speaking of getting hooked up, it is feeling really good to be single. To come home to a house that has only a dog in it. To not have messes cropping up everywhere. To not have to be somewhere at a certain time or worry about what he is going to say about something or to not have to cook a dinner how he would like it. Freedom! It feels amazing.
You know what else is amazing? I bought a container of bacon bits at the grocery store on Thursday, and they are still in the pantry, unopened. That has been unheard of in this house for the last two years. It’s little things like that, which make me oh-so-happy and grateful he is gone. I can honestly say that, so far, I don’t really miss him or Rascal. All I get is this huge sense of relief.
I think Kizzie feels relieved, too. While she probably misses the playing, Rascal was aggressive about food, territory, and people. Ok, everything. And he was the most neurotic dog ever, just SO high strung. He demanded everyone’s 110% attention, all the time. Now she’s just Momma’s little puppy again and it seems like she’s really, really happy. That might be me projecting my happiness onto her, but she sure does SEEM happier.
I probably stayed out a little too late tonight and was definitely almost three hours past taking my meds on time (yikes!) but I took them and the extra olanzapine about 30 minutes ago. I’m going to take another olanzapine and then one of these new flurazepams and go lie in bed and read. I will probably pay for all of this tomorrow, but right now I don’t care. I had fun tonight for the first time in quite awhile, and I wouldn’t take it back.