Bits and Ends

I made a promise to myself that I was going to post every day for the rest of the year, and I guess technically I am still posting tonight.  It just doesn’t feel like much.

I have all of these thoughts and feelings swirling around about a topic I can’t discuss on this blog.  I don’t know if he reads it, but it wouldn’t be right to put it out there.  To put it simply, my biological dad and I are just not on the same page.  That statement is probably not fair to him in some ways, maybe some of it’s me, but I can’t help but feel like an abandoned 6-year old, all over again.  That’s all I’m saying about that.

DSB is still in the hospital.  Pneumonia, severe.  It’s pretty bad, and the treatments for it make all sorts of other things worse.  He’s still gasping for air, I’m reminded of my grandfather, now that my mom has mentioned the similarity.  It brings back old feelings and sadness and such worry.  Extreme worry.  Nail-biting, hair-pulling worry.  And there is nothing I can do.  Nothing.  I’m getting help from QoB tomorrow (thank GOD for QoB and her ability to get a dirty house in fast order) to get the house all cleaned up for his homecoming, whenever that may be.  His doctors aren’t even setting a projected date yet.  DSB and his medical problems could fill every post for a month and I wouldn’t be done.  But I’m not going to burden anyone with that (although I seem to keep doing just that).

Related to DSB not being in the hospital, I am sleeping terribly.  I miss the feel and heat of him lying beside me.  Rascal, his pup, lies right up against me, but it’s just not the same.  DSB never licks my face like that, and he doesn’t shed.  They both fart in bed.  (tee-hee!)  In all seriousness, though, it is super-hard to not have him here.  I rely on him for so many things, that I didn’t even realize.  He is my left hand, he is my rock, he is everything to me.  And I can only see him in three or four hour increments, and he can’t talk for most of that, because he is trying to use oxygen.  It’s about to kill me, the being home alone.  It helps to go to my mom’s, but I’d rather be with DSB, even if I’m just watching TV in his hospital room while he gasps for air and mumbles something to me every so often.

It has come to my attention again today that I have great blog friends.  Emails back and forth, talking about things that are important, that aren’t important, that are.  I love it.  I love you guys.  I really do.

My sister goes back to work tomorrow, and, while I’ve asked for my share of prayers and shout-out’s to the Universe here lately, I ask that you think of her today, just for a minute, and wish her well.  It’s going to be hard for her, I know.  I wish I could live next door and just take care of that baby while she has to be gone, but it isn’t feasible.  I just want to fix it.  It’s probably not broken — my sister likes her work, but she loves that baby.

I am looking for good book recommendations.  I have a few on my Kindle that I’m getting ready to read, but I’m starting to commit myself to reading at least an hour every day, starting this coming Monday.  Suggestions and “holy-shit-stay-away-from-that’s” are welcome in the comments or by email.

Speaking of which, you should email me.  We should be friends.  I love my blog friends, as I said before, and I can never have enough.  So drop me a line, whydontcha.  RosieSmrtiePants at gmail dot com

I think that’s enough for a day.  My friend Bradley tells me he doesn’t like to read long posts and that most people don’t, and I tend to agree with that.  You should go say hi to Bradley, and check out the start of his series on his experiences with being homeless.  His series “Ten Days in Lockdown” about being hospitalized in a psychiatric facility is also very good.

We’ll cap it off here just above 700 words.  Do enjoy the video before you go.  Jack Johnson always soothes me.  Always has, always will.

Ten Things of Thankful

As I start this post, I have my fingers crossed that it will go as well as the one I did two weeks ago.  I had a record-high comment count for that day!  I think I’m getting the hang of photos and I’ve got all sorts of things to be grateful for, so let’s begin!

1) As mentioned above, I was blown away last time by all of the TToT team members comments. The bloggers who sponsor this link-up are amazing, and, when I did this two weeks ago, made me feel more welcomed in their space than I ever thought possible in a link-up.  That being said, they make an obvious choice to lead off Ten Things of Thankful.  I am thankful I found the linkup and I am thankful for the TToT team’s big welcome.

via Mohit Mago

via Mohit Mago

 

2)  Feeling a whole lot of thankful for our main employee (like, other than those in the fam) and my dad for saving my cookies on a big order today.  My back is feeling better, but I’m not up to hand-selecting 40 extra-large goldfish and dishing up 12 dozen minnows.  They must have sensed my panic when the guy placed his order, standing by the bait tanks.  I was able to pass the task off to them easily and go do what’s more my thing — bullshitting and ringing up happy customers.  😀

No, not that kind of goldfish.  Don't I wish!  As a sidenote, these are special goldfish crackers, that the blogger where this photo originated made into a recipe he calls pirhanna goldfish.  Go check them out, they look amazing!   (via http://thatdarneddad.com

No, not that kind of goldfish. Don’t I wish! As a side note, these are special recipe goldfish crackers, called piranha goldfish. Go check them out at That Darned Dad; the recipe looks delish and oh-so-easy!

 

3) Last TToT, I gave thanks for the ever useful, much needed hair tie.  Well, now I have to say I am ever so grateful for my hairbrush.  A lot like hair ties, when one loses their hairbrush, bad things can happen.  Try sleeping on wet-from-the-shower hair without brushing it first.  Good thing I had a hair tie (and a found hairbrush) the next morning!  Let’s just say it wasn’t pretty.

It was actually a little worse than this.  Picture hair about that big, but much more curly and frizzy. The originators of this picture actually have some good tips on how to repair frizziness.  Check them out here!

It was actually a little worse than this. Picture hair about that big, but much more curly and frizzy.
The originators of this picture actually have some good tips on how to repair frizziness. Check them out here!

 

4) My mom’s BFF, Glo.  She is an amazing woman, known best for her authentic Mexican cooking and looking perfectly dressed and accessorized for every occasion.  I’m actually not sure if I’ve ever seen her without earrings or at least some form of makeup on.  Glo has been taking me to church with her and helping me on my journey to perhaps become Catholic.  Glo is about the sweetest woman I’ve ever known.  She would do (and does) do anything for anyone.  I feel very blessed to have her in my life.  She is my mom’s best friend, and my good friend by proxy.

See more of these here

See more of these here

 

5) I am thankful that my friend and fellow blogger, Marilyn Armstrong, made it through serious cardiac surgery without much of a hitch and is now resting at home.  She can now hang out with her beloved dogs and amazing husband Garry Armstrong.  Marilyn has been a good bloggie friend to me now for months, commenting on my posts and exchanging emails.  She is one of the wisest women I know and I cherish our friendship.  In addition to friendship, her book, 12-Foot Teepee, sparked the desire to start getting in better touch with my God.  I am very thankful for Marilyn and am excited to see the day when we can email and chitchat back and forth again.

6) On a related note, I am very thankful that my friend has her husband, Garry Armstrong, to rely on while she is resting.  He was so very faithful to her blog while she was in the hospital, giving daily update posts.  Garry was a world-renowned TV news reporter back in his heyday, and you could see it come through in his posts.  He, of course, had to put aside his fears and worries as a  husband for a bit, and let all of Marilyn’s bloggie friends (and there are many) know how she was.  He is actually still making the posts and I know that Marilyn is leaning on him in her recovery.  He’s just an all-around good guy, as far as I can tell, and I enjoy the conversations I have with him as well.

7)  I am thankful for my parents’ dog, Miss Kitty, for putting Rascal’s fur shedding into perspective.  The only difference is that Miss Kitty lives outside, and Rascal is very much an inside pup.  While I still haven’t (and may never) get over the incessant shedding and continuous sweeping and vacuuming, I can take it as it comes and realize, as with most things, it could be worse.

I unfortunately don't have a picture of Rascal, but this one looks a lot like him.  He is a Lab/Pitt/Spaniel mix.  He sheds like a mother.

I unfortunately don’t have a picture of Rascal, but this one looks a lot like him. He is a Lab/Pitt/Spaniel mix. He sheds like a mother.

 

8) I am thankful for my mom loaning me her digital camera, after DSB broke mine.  I need to test it out, get it going, get used to it.  I was shocked to find I have no pictures of Rascal, and no current pictures of Kizzie.  This just will not do, because they will probably be gracing my TToT more than once.  Supposedly it’s just a point-and-shoot camera, and any idiot can use it.  We’ll see — I’ve never had much luck before.

This is just about exactly the camera I'll be working with.  Suggestions and tips and advice are welcome in the comments section or by email!

This is just about exactly the camera I’ll be working with. Suggestions and tips and advice are welcome in the comments section or by email!

 

9) I am thankful for DSB.  I am always thankful for DSB, actually, but I don’t always mention it.  When I hurt my back, he took one for the team several times and helped me out around the house.  He really isn’t doing very well medically, so that made it all the more special that he directed what little stamina or energy he does have into helping me.  We celebrated our two year anniversary on March 27th, and actually celebrated-celebrated last week, when we had a little extra money.  I bought him a filet knife, knife sharpener, and fishing license and made him banana pudding.  He didn’t buy a present, but gifts aren’t all material things.  He showed me, in his own way, how much he loves me.  I hope this is a love that is meant to last forever, I really do.  Sometimes I have doubts, but then we spend five hours together just talking and bullshitting and joking around, and those five hours feel like five minutes, and I think — how could this  NOT be the love of my life?

 

love-inspirational-daily

 

 

10) I am thankful to many blog friends out there, too many to name.  You consistently read and comment, you email, we chat back and forth in the comments section.  You know who you are and I want you to know that you mean the world to me.  I’ve never had friends before like I have friends now, and I never want to go back.  All of the connections I have made, the wonderful and witty and new and inspiring writing and thoughts I have been made privy to, the sense of community.  Love.  Love.  Love.

Well, What Now?

Wellpers, it’s Day 30 of NaBloPoMo, and I made it!  Woot woot!  I blogged all 30 days and it was both easier and harder than I thought it was going to be.  I should really send a big thank you to DSB, who was quite patient while I had to make time every day to write, and sometimes it was a lot of time, because of, ya know, writer’s block and answering comments and commenting on other blogs.

That’s something I didn’t do near enough of during the month…comment on blogs.  I’m usually much more up on it, and I vow to get back to it now that the month is over.  I also have some new blogs to add to my reading list, with my rowmies at the top of that list.  Who could forget Marcy, who is bravely tackling her fears one at a time?  Or Marilyn, who puts out more posts in a day than I could do in three, but each one being very high-quality, with beautiful photographs?  Or Dream, with her fun poems and tales from her classroom?  Not forgetting Rarasaur, who is one of the most hardworking dinosaur bloggers out there?

If you haven’t seen their work, go check them out in your spare time.  I know I will be keeping up with them even though NaBloPoMo is over!

Now, as far as my own blog goes, I think I started out the month pretty great, but things went downhill as Thanksgiving angst started to pour in, I quit smoking, and all the stuff hit the fan.  It’s calming down, so hopefully I can do some posts with some more thought in them, instead of a stream-of-consciousness thing.  I like those posts just as much, but I know they can be annoying to read.

I’m going to spend the next couple of weeks sorting through the 200+ new follows I have gained this month, seeing who is worth following, all that jazz.  I am sure at least some of them have to be spam, because I just don’t think I’m all that popular, or good for that matter.  I am also going to celebrate soon, because this blog is getting spectacularly close to 400 posts and I think I’m going to throw a party, complete with sparkling apple cider and party hats.

For those of you reading, thanks for hanging in there with me.  For Mom and DSB, you can breathe a sigh of relief, and it is possible I won’t be quite as obsessed with blogging.  Please note that I said possible, not likely.  😀