I was afraid to look back at my blog and see the last time I posted, but I knew it had been awhile. No particular excuse, other than living life and trying to get through the mess of the holidays and the mess and aftermath of parental divorce and enjoying the awesomeness of meeting someone new.
I have missed reading blogs for a few weeks now, but am going to start setting aside time to do that again, so you should see me popping up on your page every now and then again. I miss the interaction on this blog, in the comments, between blogs, what have you. I miss my blogging friends!
Seems that something of an Internet break was much-needed. I think it is too easy to get wrapped up in writing and commenting and following and liking and more reading, writing, commenting. Between WP and FB, I was spending far too many hours staring at a computer screen and here lately have started to remember what life is really all about.
It’s about love and family and friends. Dogs and movies and conversation. The little things, the big things — life doesn’t happen solely online, although you can live a mostly online life if you would like. I started to recall the last few years of my life the other day and realized I had spent quite a a bit of it online.
I don’t regret any of that — the reading, the writing, the friendships. For me, however, I have to have more and I wasn’t really allowing that to happen. Over just the past few weeks, I feel like I have come alive. Granted, there was some mania in there, but lately I feel like I have made some really good decisions and I feel good. That’s right. I feel happy and content and (mostly) free from anxiety.
Prior to my Internet departure, I was taking Klopin PRNs daily, but since, I have only taken one or two. I have re-learned how to soothe myself and have remembered how to look out for numero uno. I have reintroduced openness, love, and hope into the equation. I am seeing someone very dear to me and am having the best of times with it.
Who knew I could ever do these things or feel these feelings again? Nearing the end of 2013, I made a resolution that I was done with men. They were all jerks. So, I stopped looking and stopped caring, and lo and behold, the loveliest relationship is now blossoming. It seems that the old wise words are true — when you stop looking, it will happen. When you least expect it. Indeed.