Dark-thirty AM Gratitude — TToT

 

Found on tabletonic.blogspot.com

Found on tabletonic.blogspot.com

It has been awhile since I have participated in TToT.  It just seemed like the weekend always just slipped by me as I put it off again and again.  It occurred to me yesterday that the gratitude list that is TToT has always helped me immensely, as during rough times it is important to sit back and try and pinpoint the good in things, even as your mind is churning with the bad.  There of course some repeats that continue on from past TToT’s, but I am considering it a good thing that some of the positives in my life are static, no matter what hell is going on.

1). What started out easy has become really, truly difficult.  I am talking about quitting smoking, of course.  I have had a few relapses, I am sad to say.  Nothing has been permanent, but still.  I am thankful, though, that I keep on trucking even after I do slip up.

2). Secondary to the feeling good about trying to quit, is the ever-magical Atomic Fireball jawbreaker.  I have been going through these things like crazy and find they are what is best when I am having a strong craving.

3) I am grateful that (without smoking), I had enough money to open an Audible account.  I am really excited about the possibilities for audio books.

4). Related, my dad and I are going to start listening to books together and then have our own little book club.  We started Stephen King’s novel about a man going back in time to save JFK and it is really interesting and well-read.  Even Dad is liking it, and it is really not his normal kind of book.  Thanks to Marilyn at teepee12.wordpress.com for the great recommendation!

5) Speaking of Marilyn, and a few others out there, I have THE best, hands-down online friends one could ask for.  Ranging from an acquaintance to a BFF I talk to every day — even when I feel really all alone, I can hop online and then I am not.

6). It sounds like perhaps the Big Dawg isn’t going to move too far away, after all.  That in itself is anxiety reducing.  What I am saddest about it losing my family.,

7). I am thankful for my mom for so many things. She has been staying with me during the time leading up the divorce, and while there is no extra burden, I am just happy I can help.  A big plus is having her help around the house and just having someone to talk to.  And I think between the cleaning and the Kizz and the mouse traps, headway is finally beings made on the mousie infestation.  Thank heavens for that!

8). Kizzie once again also being celebrated — you just can’t stay too sad if you are playing with her or petting her or having her sit on your lap.  Dogs truly do heal the spirit, I believe.  And Kizzie is a very special dog.

9). I am thankful my writer’s block is over (knock on wood!) and it feels really good to be out in the blogosphere again.  I am especially grateful to anyone still reading, as I know those unannounced leave of absences can be annoying.

10) I am glad I have my Surface, especially since my laptop just shot craps.  I am getting used to the keyboard and touch screen, ever so slowly.  Thank you, my green friend out there, for introducing me to Surface.  🙂

To do the linkup (and you totally should) write your gratitude list, tag Lizzy, and put the link to your post in the linky-up-thingie.,  Hope you have all had a week wherein 10 things of thankful can be found

Ten Things of Thankful, Turn-it-Around Edition

This past week has been one of true growth, new realizations, (somewhat) painful lessons, and most of all, a focus on turning it around.  Turn around my perspective on health, both mental and physical, and revitalize and begin to use DBT skills again, like mindfulness, meditation, and willingness.  I am pretty sure I can easily bang a TToT out of the past week’s events.

1) Began meditating on a regular basis again, remembering that, for me, the easiest and most gratifying meditation is any form of the Loving-Kindness.

2) Turning away from wilfulness and embracing willingness.  Making the committment to be more open, to people and change.

3) Baby O still just rules my world.  His momma keeps me in pictures and I am basically getting to see him grow up everyday even though I can’t actually be there every day.  Everything about that little boy is so right and he has motivated me to do so much!

4) So what has Baby O motivated me to do?  Well, he is one of the many reasons that I quit smoking on September 13th.  I have hung in strong, and I have motivation from a lot of other places as well, mostly my health.  I know it’s not a “big deal” till you’ve done it for awhile, but I am proud that  I have not smoked for:

One week, 10 hours, 14 minutes and 21 seconds. 445 cigarettes not smoked, saving $60.15. Life saved: 1 day, 13 hours, 5 minutes.

5) Making a decision to not get mired in feeling sick.  Yes, I feel sick, but there must be something I can get up and do, even if it seems small and insignificant.  Then, if you might feel halfway decent, you slowly add another task and another over a course of a few days, and the to-do list that has been rotting  away in your hand, can be thrown away.  It is totally true that a body at rest will stay at rest, and a body in motion stays in motion.  I “get” that saying now.

6) My realization that a “family member” did not have my best interests at heart, and cutting that relationship out of my life.

7) Having grown to the point where I don’t have to spread juicy gossip, really don’t even WANT to.

8) Mom found a bunch of really cute clips for my shorter hair (with bangs…ugh).  I think this will all be workable in the end.

9) It is amazing the things that you find your postal mailbox.   No, not EVERYTHING gets emailed or texted.  🙂

10) The biggest thanks to old and new readers that were supportive this week I restarted blogging.  I realize some of it is absolute drivel, but like Marilyn says, it keeps getting better as you keep going (I paraphrase).

Now it’s your turn to head out to the TToT link-up with Liz over at Considerings.   If you don’t feel like writing a top 10, consider a top 5 or a top 3.  Or just go check out all the other crazy writers on this train!

Ten Things of Thankful, The “Week Off” Edition

In the past, I have written gratitude posts on a weekly basis for “Ten Things of Thankful.”  I quit doing that after awhile because I thought I wanted to give it a go by myself, and then I foolishly thought my focus was different and special and started “Building a Life Worth Living.”  And then I lost my focus, and I am back to the beginning.

Knowing “Building a Life Worth Living” was never going to go anywhere (although there is another blogger in the sphere who might pick it up), I’ve decided to return to “Ten Things of Thankful,” and have seen a lot of really great posts on it lately.

So, to participate in TToT, write a list of ten things you were thankful for or that were particularly awesome in the past week.  Click here to link-up with Liz at Considerings and your happy little post will be shared around the blogosphere.  Have fun!

1) I can’t remember if I mentioned it on the blog (although I know I have on FB), but I had Sunday thru Thursday off from work and it was WONDERFUL.  I caught up on sleep, TV, and with friends.  I did a ton of laundry and cleaned some neglected areas of the house.  I feel like I accomplished quite a bit, although there is always more to do.

2) In related news, I was able to go to the big city on Thursday and spend ALL DAY with Baby O.  I fed him and helped with his bath and he even let me hold him, but just a little.  It was a good day all in all.

3)  My dad and uncle are in Colorado on vacation, and Dad called to let me know they survived a scary and intense drive up and down part of Pike’s Peak.  They are both afraid of heights and Dad said, now that he’d done it, he didn’t think they’d do it again.  While I find this somewhat amusing, I am really glad they are ok.

4) Put up 12 PINTS of grape jelly (picked right off my own property) with help of my dad’s wife.  We had a lot of fun and I’ll have several Christmas presents to hand out, especially considering I don’t like grape jelly…like, at all.

5) Was sooooo very hungry yesterday morning, with little in the house but coffee, and I found a box of Shredded Mini Wheats that was only partially stale.  I know that sounds gross, but…hungry!

6) Able to speak with Goddess of Mindfulness for a bit yesterday.  Seems that other than a few little glitches, things overall are pretty good.  We have been doing a system where I leave her messages and she reads my blog, and I let her know when I want to speak with her or sometimes she will call or email me based on what she has read or heard.  It seems to be a pretty good system.

7) Big stack of paperwork to sort and file, and receipts to catalogue and put in Excel, waiting for me when I got back to work.  Job security!

8)  The busy season is pretty much over for now, so I am happy everyone is getting a little extra time off to do what they want to do.  Busy season ends always right before (or sometimes slightly after…yikes) people seem like they’re going to snap.

9)  Thank goodness for Medicare and Medicaid.  I start Medicare in October, and will have an increased number of doctors and specialists I can see.  And the Medicaid will pick up the remainder of the bill.  The best part of this is that I will have coverage for my CPAP again!

10) We are getting a lot of rain, and that will mean beautiful color on leaves during autumn.  Really must do a scenic drive of some sort!

 

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Ten Things of Thankful, Sickie Poo Edition

 

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I have two lovely TToT banners today, the above courtesy of Mama and the one at the end courtesy of the TToT blog-hop folks.  I like both, so I’m going to use both.  Sorry, I’m feeling defiant after a row with my well-meaning but obnoxious father.  I was going to turn it into a “Open Letter to Dad” but decided against it because I am still just TOOOOO angry.  Will have to settle for a little banner-acting-out behavior instead.

 

1) I am thankful for my mom this week.  When I needed Rx picked up, she jumped right on it.  She also brought me excellent sickie supplies since I was on a clear liquids diet for almost three days, but am now a BRAT (bananas, rice, applesauce, toast).  It feels good to be a brat and I cheated and ate ramen noodles for dinner, but hey, there’s probably some rice in those noodles!  So thanks, Mom, for always taking such good care of me, no matter the circumstances.

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2) I am thankful to have a job, a job that I like, a job that I am good at, and a job where I like my co-workers and bosses.  I am thankful they have adapted the last month as I spent a few days in the loony bin and then several days after that being loony and, just when the looniness ceased, developed the killer stomach flu.  And I still have a job.  They still want me back, and I am ready to come back as soon as I can get my fever down and be deemed noncontagious by QoB.  And stop being so dizzy.

3) I am thankful that I have a nice, clean comfortable house, with running and recently serviced AC.  I see many friends sweating it out on FB and all over the blogosphere and I just can’t think how much sicker I would feel if my house was 95 degrees.

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4) I am thankful I have  a “dumb” phone.  My friends and relatives are always having a helluva time with their smart phones.  The fanciest thing I ever do is put Walgreens on speaker.

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5) I know how much I might bitch about them sometimes, but I am thankful for Walgreens.  They rarely mess my stuff up anymore, it’s less than two blocks from my house, and they’re just so speedy and organized.  I could say less for their online site, but this is a POSITIVE post.

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6) I am thankful that Mom is holding onto my debit card for me.  Over the last month I was really doing some ridiculous spending — it’s bad when you don’t have enough left over from your little impulse buys to purchase groceries.  The beauty of it is that I did of my own free volition.  (Atta Girl!)

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7) I am thankful for WP and FB friends, old and new.  You guys are awesome, keeping up with me when I am bored, making me laugh, listening when I cry, just giving me awesome information and new things to look into.  I really do appreciate all of you!

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8) I am thankful for Caller ID, because sometimes, you just want to screen your calls.  There’s some people you REALLY want to talk to, and some you wish would fall into a dark well (temporarily, of course).  I don’t think that’s necessarily a bad thing.

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9) I am once again, this and every week, thankful to Kizzer pup.  She has been a real trooper.  She was home by herself for almost four days, and she did really well with Grandma paying her visits.  It took awhile for her to get used to me being back, but soon she was up to her Kizzerly tricks again.  It seems since Grandma visited, she gets a lot more bones.  I don’t think that one is all on the Kizzer.

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Kizzer’s Favorite — Dingo Rawhides

10) I am thankful that I have the ability to forgive, because while it won’t be today and it might not be tomorrow, I do have the ability and willingness to call Dad on his crap, and it will happen.  And I will forgive him and he will try and explain and it will be over.

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Ten Things of Thankful, Birthday Edition!

Remember, you can join Ten Things of Thankful by linking up with Liz at Considerings.  Easy peasy lemon squeezy (I’m not sure that’s how that goes, but I don’t really give an eff, because it rhymes. Just call me Big Dawg if that ain’t it.).

Banner is courtesty of Mental Mama, and that link will also take you directly to her TToT for the week.

Without any further adieu:

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1)  Maybe I should have been like Mama and labeled mine “10 Things That Didn’t Suck This Week.”  That’s kind of how I’m feeling.  My first thankfully thank-you, though, IS to Mama.  We were chatting and I am pretty sure I was moaning about how I really just needed a six-pack of Budweiser Cheladas (I don’t drink), and she brought DBT right into the picture.  Practice opposite to emotion.  My main emotion right now is intense anger and anxiety, directed at ol’ DSB (who can do nothing about all the shitty things he has done, even if he wanted to), so I am doing TToT because it makes me joyful and hopeful.  You get that — joyful and hopeful being opposite to anger and anxiety?  Sometimes I forget.  😦

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2)  I am thankful for the support of my family.  I promise, this TToT will not be a rerun, because I always mention family, but it’s just THAT DAMN IMPORTANT.  My family is everything to me and sometimes, I lose sight of how hard this is on THEM, to always be there for me, someone who has special and magical bipolar powers.  For a perfect explanation, go to yesterday’s entry and read the comment from QueenofDaNile (mom).  I read that this morning and it made total sense.  For the first time in a long time, actually, it made sense.  I would copy and paste, but you wouldn’t get the full effect unless you read the post, as well.

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3)  I am thankful for large packages of toilet paper and paper towels.  When  you’re buying them, you’re thinking, “Nine dollars?!  Really?!” but it’s so nice to rarely run out.  Thank you, Madre, for teaching me this invaluable lesson (and buying the last package of TP!)

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4)  I am thankful my sister is going to come help me clean this gawdawful mess up on the 10th.  I’m nervous, too, though.  What if she sees the squalor and runs?  What if I can’t keep up?  Ok, frankly, what happens when I can’t keep up?  I just keep remembering her words, “I love you unconditionally.”  “I would never judge you.”  Okay, breathing in and out now.  In, out, in, out.

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5) Feeling a bit more frivolous as we go, and not to say that TToT is frivolous, but let’s all eat a piece of cake this weekend, because it is TToT’s 1st birthday!  I am so thankful I found this gem and I look forward to it every week.  I have missed a couple of times and I was always so disappointed when I didn’t make the deadline.

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6) I am thankful for all the new toiletries and laundry stuff that my dad hooked me up with.  I am smelling clean all the way around, and I kinda like it.  The people around me probably appreciate it as well.  I hate to shower, and the soaps he bought me are very motivating.  And who knew that buying Tide would be a big difference after buying the $7 Purex all these years?  And having dryer sheets again has been phenomenal.  Now if I just had some elves to come put all this laundry away!

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7) I am thankful that I was too lazy tonight to go and spend my grocery money on ice cream.  I really reaaaaaallly wanted a salted caramel shake from Sonic, a little bit of heaven, but I resisted.  That’s $2 I’ll have to buy healthier stuff with, and I’m not packing extra poundage onto my rear end.

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8) I am extremely thankful that the Kizz Wizz was not injured and did not escape when a huge limb came crashing out of a tree in my back yard a couple days ago.  It happened while I was at work, and I was beyond relieved to see her trotting out her doggie door toward me.  Big thanks also to the tree service who were here the next day and totally took care of things in a matter of hours, including cleaning up after themselves.  The Big Dawg came and put the fence back up, and now we’re in business.

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Not my yard, but a branch just that big!

9) I am thankful for all suggestions for new music.  After DSB, I am so sick to death of country that I could spit.  It’s on the radio all the time at work, all the presets in my car are set to it (there is not a decent radio station anywhere around here), and the only times I can get away are either with silence or Pandora.  Too bad Pandora doesn’t come in your car…or does it?

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10) Last but not least, I am very pleased that my local library APPEARS to have the entire Jack Reacher collection, as well as one other (that I’m blanking on the name of, but that Marilyn recommended).  And that’s where I’m headed.  I no longer feel angry (in the name of opposite-to-emotion, Mama!).  I feel like I need to lay a good long while in bed and get my book read, as it will be auto-returned for me on the 2nd.

 

 

 

Ten Things of Thankful, Lucky Number Seven

I have been a bit in and out of the blogosphere this week as I am learning new routines and catching up with people and, really, being more social than I have been in years.  I’m to the point where I’m actually ready to just spend some quality time at home with the Kizz.  My batteries need recharging.  I’m hoping this week’s TToT will give me a lift.

Don’t forget to hook up with Liz at Considerings for the link-up.  All sorts of crazy action goes on with your blog when you link up.

 

1)  Hooray for figuring things out.  I am thankful that I have been able to figure out many things for myself, that I previously relied on DSB for.  It turns out there’s nothing so magical about the things he can do, that I can’t replicate.  I don’t need no stinkin’ man!  (LOL, Madre)

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I am thankful for all three parents.  And they’re each going to get their own number, because that’s just how awesome they have been.

2) Mom, you get to go first, because you bear the brunt of it.  I am thankful that you have been there for tears and anger and cheered me on while I listed out stuff that I didn’t used to “be able” to do and how things are so different now.  I am thankful for you for harrassing me to see the pdoc when things got hypomanic.  You work tirelessly to better my situation and I can’t thank you enough for that.  And I’m thankful that you’re just you — always accepting, never (hardly ever) impatient, and an all around positive person to be around.  MTLI.

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3) I am thankful for the Big Dawg to fixing the big issues, like getting my lawnmower situation straightened out or offering to handle all the people that (at some point) will come out of the woodwork and want their items and/or money back that DSB has just left up in the garage, stuff that he was working on.  I am thankful that our relationship has progressed to the point where you can actually ask me how I’m doing, and I know you really want the whole, unvarnished truth.  This song reminds me so much of us:

 

4) I am thankful, Dad, at how accepting you have become.  You are genuinely happy to see DSB go (as many were) and are putting a lot of energy into helping me round out my time with positive things.  I know I can always call you late into the evening when I am upset and you will talk me through things.  You’re back to “being there” and I am every so thankful for that.

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5) I am thankful for my newly adopted brother, Rock, even though I am at times very jealous of him.  I have to remember who he is to the people I love, and treat him accordingly.  Hopefully the jealousy will go away in time, but the jealousy is no one’s fault but my own.  We all have our opinions and the best I can do is cut him some slack and remind myself that he’s only a 21 year old male, and then think of what I was like at that age, and remind myself just how screwed up my head was then.  If I think about it like that, I can empathize with him, not that he would ever admit that  he had any problems.  Sibling rivalry.  I’m thankful to have it, if Rock can bring such joy to my mom.

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6)  I am thankful I am not in one of the 25 people in a three-block vicinity that had their mailboxes totally destroyed by vandals a few days ago.  Some of them were hit so hard, that the post was knocked over, as well.  Total ridiculousness.  I hope they find the people that did it and they serve jail time.  Totally rude and disrespectful.

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7) I am thankful to be headed over to Mom’s soon for a steak dinner.  I don’t remember the last time I ate steak, but I love it.  It’s not generally do-able on my budget, but with DSB gone, it might be affordable.  I’d have to have Big Dawg grill it, though, as he is the master of the charcoal grill.

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8) I am thankful for my pup, Kizzie.   Yes, I know she is on here every week, but she is just that gosh-darn special.  She has been enjoying spending lots of QT with her momma and getting special treats.  I had her groomed last week, but failed to get photos.  Below is one from a few years ago — she looks pretty much the same except she is more muscular now.   She’s friggin’ adorable!Kizz as a pup

 

 

9) I am thankful I have not heard a single word from DSB.  I tried to call him a couple of times, but it went straight to voicemail.  I don’t believe I will ever hear from him, and that’s probably a good thing.  Sometimes I feel like I didn’t get closure, but mostly I’m just pretending he died.  Is that bad?

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10) I am thankful to see more bloggie friends doing TToT.  Two weekends to TToT #50!

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Ten Things of Thankful, Fourth Edition

It’s the end of another week, and it’s time to link up with Liz at Considerings, among others, and shout-out what has made you thankful this week.  This link-up is one of my favorites, because it usually makes me feel like I just gave myself a really big hug.

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1) I am thankful for Easter.  For the chocolate, the jelly beans, the scrape-it-together dinner DSB and I are having.  I’m thankful I’ll get to see my mom for a couple hours and I’m thankful I had a nice chat with my dad this morning.  I’m thankful for the Easter pictures of my nephew and I am thankful that DSB is home for the holiday.  Yay for Easter!

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2)  I am thankful for my Crock-Pot.  So many a harried evening has been saved by the Crock-Pot.  Feeling a little lazy?  Throw something in the Crock-Pot.  Going to have a crazy day?  Throw something in the Crock-Pot.  Chicken that thawed three days ago and needs to be cooked?  Throw it in the Crock-Pot.  Tonight’s Easter dinner is featuring frozen chicken quarters cooked in the (yes) Crock-Pot, which will then be shredded and sauteed with a BBQ sauce and Italian dressing mixture.  Quite tasty.  And convenient!

This is the exact crock-pot I have, color and all.  I also have a slightly smaller, rounder black one.

This is the exact crock-pot I have, color and all. I also have a slightly smaller, rounder black one.

 

3)  I am thankful for my Nalgene.  I may have posted that on TToT before, but it has been a huge money and thirst-saver for me.  I have always drank a lot of water, but I would also frequently indulge in Sonic drinks, or Taco Bell Happy Hour slushes, you get the point.  That money added up, and I was still always left feeling thirsty.  I now  have a Nalgene (that my mom bought the special cap for…woot woot, Mom!) and I love it.  It is a 48 oz and I drink three or four, sometimes five of these a day.  I love water, as long as it has ice!

Mine is that color blue, but much larger, and with a drink-easy cap.

Mine is that color blue, but much larger, and with a drink-easy cap.

 

4)  I am thankful for Mom helping me get some summer clothes.  I like to be able to show up to work and look clean and put-together and (at least somewhat) cute.  She makes that happen every year, and just this past week she picked me up a few things that were very cute (and fit!).  I appreciate her doing this so much — I am not a good clothes shopper!

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5) Related to number four, I am thankful that I realized yesterday, while at work, that I really AM kinda cute.  I’m a big girl, but that doesn’t mean I can’t be attractive.  I had one of my new outfits on, and I caught a glimpse of my reflection, and was like, really?  That’s not so bad!  Actually half-decent!  I just hope I can hold onto that thought/feeling for awhile.

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6) I am thankful that I deleted the first TToT I wrote today.  I was tired, I wasn’t in a good place, and I was forcing it.  Now I feel the words flowing, am finding great pictures, and feel like this is more “me.”  I almost decided not to do TToT today, because of that first go-round.  Now I’m glad I did.  Here’s to not giving up on yourself.  Hear, hear!

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7)  I am thankful for Mom helping me get the house cleaned up before DSB came home.  She is such a trooper and a great motivator.  I wish I had 1/2 her energy and stamina.  She is in the latter part of her fifties and can outwork most 20ish men.  I know that because I see it happen on a daily basis in the store.  She is very generous with her time in helping me, and in giving me a kick in the ass when I really need to get something done.  Love you, Madre!  xoxo

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8)  I am thankful I am sleeping again, but wonder how much longer until I will be caught up.  I am thankful for the sleepiness and the resting, because missing a week’s sleep could have swung the other direction.  Am I actually having a normal reaction to not getting enough sleep?  Oh my!

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9)  I am thankful for Dollar General, where it seems you can always find that one ingredient you were  missing, without having to go to the actual grocery store.  Also, the milk is always fresh!

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10)  I am thankful last, but not least, to the amazing people who read this blog, comment, like, even those who don’t comment and don’t like.  I know you’re out there.  Within the next three or four days, I should hit 1,000 follows.  Never imagined I’d make it that far!

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Now hurry up, get your TToT done, and link-up over at Considerings!

Ten Things of Thankful, Third Edition

Today’s Top Ten was inspired by the following:

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Yesterday’s post (which was read by I think, four people and didn’t even receive a like, not that I’m bitter or the low number freaks me out or anything) was all about never giving up, with a second half that sprawled out into the wide world of why it’s not good to lie.  I know, totally random.  It was one of those kind of days.

But, like Joe Dirt, in my opinion the funniest and most heartwarming David Spade movie to date, Joe keeps keeping on.  Just like I’m keeping on, through so much good stuff that it outweighs the bad.  In some ways it’s hard to keep keepin’ on right now, because DSB is in such a bad place.  I feel like I don’t have my partner, like some of the oxygen in my air has been sucked out, like things are just a little bit like a tilt-a-whirl at the carnival and my little seat keeps going round and round as the bigger platform gyrates up and down.

You get the point.

1) I am thankful for giant beach towels.  Kizzie is hiding under one spread across my legs as I sit here and type this.  She is terrified of rain and thunder.  DSB is in bed already and apparently Kizzie was not successful in getting tucked  under the blanket.  It’s kind of nice to me, because these days she usually runs to him when she’s scared.  It’s a good feeling to be her protector every now and again.

2) I am thankful for blog posts in which I make no sense at all.  It keeps me humble and reminds me that I should never write a book, as much as it might be encouraged.  I feel sad when there isn’t even a single like on a post, and maybe one comment.  I mean, I get it.  I don’t read and like and comment on every single thing that I read, but I do on a lot.  It’s one of those things that just is.  People like the damndest things that I write, and then skip over some that I think are pretty good.  Whatev.  I’m not in it for the money or the fame and glory.  I’m in it because I genuinely like doing it, even if it’s only for my own sake and the only person that reads it is my mom and therapist.

via

I know, Mom.  I know!

3) I am above and beyond thankful for my Kindle.  I was never one of those people who said, “oooohhh, but I LOVE real books.  The paper and the smell and the blah blah blah.”  I had to have one from the moment they came out and took off.  I’m on my second now, a Kindle PaperWhite and I love love love it!  I love being able to download books from my county library for free (just like with a real book, I know), I love $1.99 specials and 50 books under $3.99 and big credits on my account when the publishing firms screw up and lawyers decide they owe the readers money.  I love not  having big dusty bookshelves and accidentally tearing pages and dogs chewing them to shreds.  I can’t think of one single thing I don’t like about my Kindle.  Bury me with it.

from Amazon.  I have the pink case.  :D

from Amazon. I have the pink case. 😀

4) On a related note, I am thankful that Dean Koontz just keeps on writing.  That man can write like nobody’s business, and he’s just a-churnin’ ’em out!  I am currently working my way through the “Odd” series.  I had already read the first three some time ago, like when they came out, but much to my delight, I found out there were several more and my library carries ALL of them in their ebook library.  Can a girl ever get more lucky than that?

5) I am thankful for the ability to run the air conditioner in my car with the windows down.  This may sound silly, but sometimes it’s hot, but the breeze feels nice.  It’s probably all sorts of wasteful and I’m probably going to get an email from my mom or a lecture from my dad on how hard that is on a car’s system, but I’ll take my moment where I can get it.  It’s not like I do it all the time, all right?

6) I am thankful that Blue Bell ice cream pints were on sale today when I went to Walgreen’s to pick up some cough medicine for DSB.  And they had mint chocolate chip, which just made my whole damn day.  I find that, when your food budget is extremely limited, you don’t get a whole lot of chances to eat ice cream or cookies or chocolate.  Because that stuff is expensive!  But so is broccoli.  Go figure.

7) With all the ongoing anxiety (all related to DSB’s health and welfare), I have been having a hard time falling asleep.  I saw my psychiatrist early this week and he prescribed Sonata.  Of course, there was a prior authorization from my insurance required, so I managed to get it by yesterday evening.  Let’s just say that I am thankful for Sonata, because I fell right to sleep.  I did, however, wake up and put my shorts on inside-out.  Do not know if the two are related.

via Walgreen's

via Walgreen’s

8) I am thankful most of all this week, for prayers, kind thoughts, candles lit, dances danced, and so on for DSB and hope for recovery from ill health.  Not quite sure what’s wrong at the moment, other than he is extremely short of breath and is coughing.  And running a fever.  And having pain in his chest.  He assures me he is not having a heart attack, and since this has been going on a week, I presume he is correct.  My fear is that his blood clots are back somewhere and his thought is that he has a cold which may or may not have turned into pneumonia.  I am very scared at this point, because it just seems like health problem after health problem and he can’t function properly.  It really has him depressed, too.  And there’s nothing I can do, unfortunately other than making sure he stays hydrated and gets up and walks around once in awhile (to prevent more clots).  And nagging him to see a doctor.  So, if you’re reading, and you’re any kind of spiritual, send a shout out to the Universe that DSB recovers soon.  I feel like one of my legs is missing.

dandelion

9)  I am thankful for having a working car.  I can’t even imagine how difficult it would be without personal transportation.  Sure, there’s public transportation here, but it’s in the city.  And from what I hear, it’s less than ideal.  Maybe in a big city I would be okay without a car, but I have so many appointments (and so does DSB), that I think it would be a real hassle.  So, I am feeling very fortunate.

2004-chrysler-pt-cruiser-4dr-wgn-blue_100137332_m

10) I am thankful I am not addicted to Facebook anymore.  I don’t know if it’s just the “friends” I have, but there is so much negativity and drama.  I opened it up for a little while about an hour ago to check on something on my parents’ business’ site, but jeez.  It’s terrible and horrible.  Maybe it’s just me and I need to develop a tougher skin.  Whatever the case may be, I’m seriously considering deleting my account.

images

I couldn’t find one with a “thumbs down,” which is what I really wanted. 😦

And that’s the long and short of it.  This is a really fun post to do, and you have through Sunday to get ‘er done for the link-up, which you can find at Considerings.