I have some good, and perhaps unexpected news tonight. I, Rosa, have had a GOOD day here this 19th day of September. Really an all-around good day. Physically, I woke up feeling relatively fine and only had issues with some crazy awful nausea during the day. I find that if I sit very very still, this helps.
In the not-too-distant future, I can see myself functioning again. I can see it and I can believe it and I have taken that photograph with me in my mind’s eye, so that I can keep referring back. When I meditated this morning, it was a sort-of loving-kindness meditation that I had adapted to do what I wanted it to (my favorite kind).
My words for myself were:
May my body heal.
May my soul straighten.
May my mind be free from other’s drama.
May I live my life today, easy and carefree.
My words for others were:
May you be at ease with your pain and suffering
May a great joy come to you today.
May you realize I always forgive you.
May you be free from the pain of life, if just for a moment
You can really make a meditation into anything you want it to, save that it is helpful to you and/or someone else. I like the loving-kindness meditations, because “to self” words always soothe. You must pick them out as particular to you. These words you are putting into the world, they find people and knock them down and pick them back up again and set everything on course because, well, you are using these words to express love to yourself, which will set everything else afire.
The “to others” words can be particularly strong and powerful, to someone else and to YOU. The best thing I like to do when starting “to others” words, is to picture a person I don’t much care for, or, even better, one who has caused me pain. You say these words over and over, to a flawed but perhaps, deep inside, tortured person. Your words may never mean anything to them, but the words help you to see this person in a different light.
My apologies for interrupting the status update with a little note on mindfulness, meditation, and loving-kindness meditation. I still have quite the fog circling my brain, but I think I am coming through it.