Never Say Never

I am following in the footsteps of BeadStork, who recently wrote a “never say never” post.  I can think of a lot of “never’s” that I have claimed throughout my years, that in some way or another have come back to bite me on the butt.  Like BeadStork says, karma, kismet, the laws of the universe, God, something out there will make you wish you  had never uttered the word “never” (or that will just make you laugh at yourself for thinking you had any control over your life…thanks for that one, Beadstork).

Like the time I said I would never date an older guy, after having had a horrible experience (not once, but twice).  Again.  Never.  Well, destiny (or God, yeah, I’m leaning toward God) plopped DSB right on my doorstep and he is a full nine years and nine months older than I am.  In our particular relationship, age really is irrelevant.

We like to do the same things, he doesn’t treat me like a kid and I don’t treat him like an old man, and we are pretty well balanced.  I do thank God for bringing old and grouchy a more mature man into my life, because I don’t think one my age (or younger) could have handled the bipolar battles of the last two years.

Then there were many times when I declared, staring at the numbers on the scale, “I’ll never weigh more than that.”  Really, Rosa?  I don’t think the powers that be are telling me something, but my weight keeps creeping up and up and I mentally berate myself for all of the times I thought I was fat, obsessed about being fat, when I was in fact thin or of normal or of even pudgy weight.

If I could only get back to thence which I came.  I don’t have to be thin, height/weight proportionate (what asshole came up with that term?), or even “normal.”  I just want to drop about 100 pounds and I would be THRILLED.

“I’ll never move back home.”  Oh man, how that phrase has caught me up multiple times.  During each and every breakdown, there was a period of time where I moved back home, even if I still had my own place.  I’m in a good place with it now, and I know it is what I needed, but there is nothing like having to stay with your parents because you are mentally unstable to cut your feeling of grown-up-edness at the knees.

Some other shorter “nevers” that tell the tale for themselves:

• I’d never pay that much for a haircut (or product)
• I’ll never buy gas/groceries/food/etc there again (sometimes you get in a pinch!)
• I’ll never smoke again (day by day process, at this point)
• I’ll never wear sweatpants in public
• I’ll never eat that much again
• I’ll never let myself be lied to or yelled at again
• I’m never getting Netflix/Hulu again (those first month free offers are killers!)
• I’m never going to group therapy (and you can’t make me…ha!)

So the point is, there are many “never’s” we say in life that can turn around and bite us on the butt.  I had many more that were waaaayy too racy or gross or inappropriate to put up there.  😀

If you feel like having a little fun, join in and be sure to link back to BeadStork!